


Two Minds

by GoringWriting



Series: 3...2...1 [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Invasion of Privacy, M/M, POV Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), POV Gwaine (Merlin), Pining Gwaine (Merlin), Protective Gwaine (Merlin), Regret, Sad Gwaine, Spying, sad Arthur, watching a private conversation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:53:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27286726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoringWriting/pseuds/GoringWriting
Summary: After Gwaine and Arthur discover just how much Merlin has lost and what he feels the two of them reflect on what they have learned and what to do with this information.
Relationships: Gwaine/Merlin (Merlin)
Series: 3...2...1 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1991551
Comments: 1
Kudos: 134





	Two Minds

Gwaine is reeling. Merlin is in love with him. His feelings are returned! He had spent months trying to get the man to notice that his flirtations were more than just friendly and here it is. Merlin is in love with him!

Gwaine tried to feel excited about the revelation but there have been far too many of those tonight. He has learned far more about Merlin than he had wanted to at such an early point but here he is, knowing things that he has no right to know yet. Merlin should have been allowed to tell him on his own terms. Not have them exposed to people hiding in the bushes like cowards. 

That knowledge twists in his stomach and settles there heavy and uncomfortable and anger burns there as well. They had no right to violate Merlin’s trust in such a way. Violate Lancelot’s trust in such a way either. Both men had revealed things to each other that they hadn’t to anyone else. 

What a mess.

In one act he had learned that he reminded Merlin of a past best friend. He had heard the story of Arthur going to save Merlin’s village but had not been told the man that had died was so close to him. He hadn’t even known the story about Merlin’s father dying nor that Merlin has ever been in love. Gwaine has been given a lot to think about in such a short amount of time and he hates Arthur for taking away his chance to have Merlin open up to him because he trusts him. 

Gwaine has known people who have lost their loved ones before, hell he’s lost his father and the rest of his family are as good as gone. But he knows that if someone had listened in on him telling Merlin about his family he would be upset. Because clearly Merlin didn’t feel comfortable enough to give them the stories. They should have had to earn it, but they didn’t. They piggybacked in a most unknightly manner and they have proved themselves to be every bit the stuck up arseholes he assumes nobles to be already. 

Now he has to figure out if he wants to tell Merlin or if he should tell Merlin what he overheard and maybe even offer to tell him that he will forget everything if it would make Merlin feel better again. 

Arthur looks over at where Gwaine is lost in thought. He never should have followed Merlin out here. If someone had done something similar to him it would be treason and yet he had just stormed out here and into his manservant’s private affairs like a giant prat. 

He never learns anything, no matter how many times Merlin and Gwen try to teach him. Gwen would be so disappointed in him. If Gwen had been there she never would have allowed him to follow the two men out into the woods. 

Arthur glances at Gwaine who is looking over at where they had last seen Merlin and Lancelot and he looks at the ground. 

Arthur thinks back to when the bastet was running amok in Camelot. Specifically the day after he killed the beast...the woman. Merlin had looked a little down. His smile was a little more forced that morning after waking Arthur. Arthur just chalked it up to him being tired of being teased about the dress.

Now that he knows about Freya he realizes that the dress was likely for her and he was being even more of a prat than he ever thought himself capable of being. 

Merlin and Lancelot are two of his most loyal subjects and he ignored that. 

Arthur looks back at where Merlin had been. He should apologize. For not being more understanding with Will. Should have known about Freya and about Merlin’s father. He should have asked. He’s so disappointed in himself. 

His father wouldn’t care. He would say that a King should not feel guilty for violating the trust of the people. Would say a King can do anything they want. 

But Arthur is not his father and Merlin is not just some random subject. He needs to talk to Merlin to explain and ask forgiveness because Arthur knows that this crossed a line and that this is different from when he calls Merlin an idiot or a coward. This wasn’t banter, this wasn’t fondness, this was disrespect. Arthur was raised well enough to recognize that if this had been done to him, regardless of it being treasonous it would also be an insult to himself as a person. 

And Merlin…

Merlin deserves better than this. 

Merlin deserves the honesty that Arthur robbed from him. 

At almost the same moment, both King and Knight decide that they need to talk to Merlin. 

It’s what needs to be done.


End file.
